Randomness: 'Tis The Season

Today was... GOOD. No, "good" is not enough to describe today. First, it was the second and last day of exams, so you have no idea how relieved I was. I mean, I trudged through this whole week, beating deadlines, passing this and that, studying like hell. All I wanted was for the week to end, and vacation to start. You know, the only thing that probably got me through the exams and torturous studying was the fact that they're the only way to freedom. Yeah. Endure it all.

So now, I'm glad. Christmas vacation begins! We also had our Christmas party in class, which was a blast. Everyone was happy, and it was contagious. And this afternoon, I also spent some time with my friends in the mall, and then tonight, we have this Christmas party for my dad's officemates, right in the house. As of now, I'm typing while my ears are being bombarded by people karaoke-ing (is that even a word?) outside. It isn't that bad, really.

But - yes, there's a 'but' - I'm still not completely relieved. Because... tomorrow I have this recital. Where I have to play the piano. Where I have to be in front of about a hundred people. Where I might freak out and forget what I am supposed to play. Where I will definitely make a fool of myself. Okay, calm down. I'm getting the jitters now. Butterflies in my stomach. The urge to throw up. God, I'm gonna be sick.

I guess I'd just have to... endure it. Right? One last obstacle to freedom. One more to overcome and I'll have nothing to worry about next. One last and I'm free.

Taking the whole day as a whole, I'd still say it was awesome, so thank God for it, for this season of giving and loving. If only I don't have this lump in my throat, as if I'm going to be sick. I hope not.

Wish me luck.

31 Days Later

I'm back. And I can't believe that it's been exactly a month: last post was on Oct. 8 and now it's Nov. 8. What a coincidence that it's only today that I've finally decided or found time to post again. I mean, I just felt so... lazy. So now, I'm going to make up for everything. My resolution: post everyday! Piece of cake. (Really?)

So much had happened these past 31 days: activities in school, or just plain regular lessons, sem. break (awesome and boring and okay), to name a few. I actually don't remember a lot (isn't it funny that we sometimes forget our thoughts when we try to write them down? You know. They seem to shy away from you. Then when you don't think about this and that, they bother you). Oh, I also remember my mother had come back from Europe. She looked just like when she left (except maybe that she gained some weight. A little). Anyway, life's back to normal, or as normal as it was before.

So one word to describe everything? (Not only because Christmas is in the air now. But that can be a reason too...)

Cool.

Randomness: Plain Rambling

Yippee! Today, September 19, Sunday, I am celebrating ten straight days of posting in my blog. Hah. Obviously, today's the 10th day and I am proud of myself for blogging at least once a day these past days. Well, I know some people blog so many times a day, but for me this is an achievement because I don't usually have this determination. I mean, ten days ago I made a goal that I will post everyday and with sheer perseverance, I did it. Now you might think ten days are too short and I should only be congratulating myself when I've reached ten months (or ten years. Or maybe never.). But never mind. This is just to motivate myself. Now blogging once a day has become a part of my daily routine. Though it's kind of hard, you know, because you have to have lots of ideas, and sometimes I just become stuck. But writing (I'll just call it writing instead of blogging; it sounds more...encouraging. Whatever.), as I have said before, is the best medicine indeed.

Oh no, I'm rambling again. Let's move on to more important matters. First and foremost, I have no idea what to write about today (well, considering the lengthy paragraph above, maybe I do have some idea) and I'm just going to settle on plain ranting and rambling. Second, I'll ramble for a while now.

Today is Sunday and homework day for me, but now it's past six in the evening and I haven't done anything at all. Heaven help me. I woke up very late and then I spent the whole day finishing a novel. I've finished it now, by the way. But after finishing it I realized, I'm dead. I've wasted my whole day! Hey, not really.

Anyway, I got to end here. We're still going to church. I'll be praying for the night ahead of me, that I will be saved from my father's wrath when he sees me still doing homework. And that I may sleep a little early. Eleven will do.

Writer's Block Makes You Go Crazy

Write. Anything. Write. Something. Write, write, write. Write whatever. Write...what? The thing is, I've run out out of ideas now. A major, major problem right now for me: writer's block. Or maybe blogger's block. Or how about... never mind, I have no idea anymore.

These days I've been trying to post everyday, and I've done it for two days straight (a milestone) so I'm trying to keep the good work up for a week or two (why not more?). Posting daily? Geez, that is so easy-peasy. Hah. Seems like it is, but once you're in front of the computer and there's the white blank space, your brain suddenly stops producing neurons, resulting in much staring ahead and drooling and wondering what on earth are you supposed to do.

Write, of course, a tiny part of your brain that is still mercifully functioning says. Then it goes again, oh what were you planning to write anyway? No idea? Good. Don't pressure me for ideas. Give me a rest!

Cut! I am now in a major breakdown moment. Have I gone crazy now? I mean, one minute I'm describing what happens with writer's block, then the next minute I'm babbling and hearing voices. My brain's voice, that is. And my brain seemed to be arguing with itself. Not sure.

Writer's block really does make one crazy. But you know what the best medicine is (proven and tested, but beware of side effects. Proof above)?

Write. And write some more.

I Dream, Therefore I Exist.

(above quote by August Strindberg, A Madman's Defense)

Today my mother goes to Paris. No, scratch that: she's already there (she had just texted). And here I am, stuck at home, suffering from boredom. Wish I went with her.

Unfortunately that couldn't be. My mother will be in Europe for a month, staying with her brother in Amsterdam. Lucky her. She'll be travelling in Europe! If only it was summer, if only it wasn't too costly... I might be there myself.

Anyway, no time for wishful thinking. It's good for mama that she's having a long vacation. No pesky little kids and whiny daughters. It's a break, and she'll come back grinning from ear to ear, with some souvenirs, pasalubong, and lots of photos.

One day I'm going there too. One day I'll be travelling all over the world. One day I'll be in Paris. One day, one day.

Why Paris? Well, it's on my top 100 places to visit before I die. I just love everything French, and Paris is somehow the place where people go to and dreams come true. In movies and books, that is. Is it the same in real life?

Wishful, wishful thinking. Dreams. All dreams. A girl can dream. But she'll have to work hard for that. Right?

To self: "Nothing happens unless first we dream."(Carl Sandburg)

To mama (who's probably having the time of her life there):

We miss you! Love, your whiny daughters.

Randomness: A Sip of Sentimentality

Things that just cluttered my mind so I had to let it out. No connection to my life right now. =) I don't even know what's the purpose of all these words. But as the title says, randomness rules. Write whatever.

You smile, and I smile

Clearly, we're meant to be.

***

I looked out the window

Saw the raindrops

And I thought I saw you out there

But you were just a dream

A figment of my imagination.

***

O Romeo, Romeo

Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

'Tis midnight and the moon is hidden

Wilt thou hide from me too?

Methinks thou have forgotten

But I have not

Thou may not be Romeo

But I will wait

For thou art my only heart.

***

Good things never last that long

But with you nothing can go wrong.

***

One and one makes two

But go away because I hate you.

;P

Randomness: Babbling Nonsense

I honestly don't know what to write about right now. My mind is just blank. No flashes of inspiration, no lightbulbs (you know that lightbulb on top of people's heads, in comics?). So I'm just stuck.

I've kind of read once that if faced with a writer's block, one should just write anything that comes into their mind. Write away, and soon ideas will be coming out like a fountain.

So now I'm here trying hard. I'm really supposed to go off to bed now, especially since my dad's gonna burst at any moment. And tomorrow it's school again. I haven't even started packing my things.

Today's father's day. (Right?) We've just greeted papa, and had shown him a couple of videos (all day mama had bugged me to finish them and show them to everyone. Whew...).

Hershey (our new shihtzu) is so adorable! He's panting on the floor, playing with a ball, and half-annoying, half-charming us. He really looks like a rag right now, so I might step on him. Sometimes I think our floor is so clean because he mops it with his fur (so long and thick). I don't think the poor dog could even see at all.=)

Today was just like any other day. Sunday, at home, doing homework, procrastinating. Oh, and eating. Lots of it. At school I only eat during recess and lunch, and then the whole afternoon I starve (no allowance yet! =D). But on weekends it's heaven. On a Saturday I sit, eat, watch TV, sit more, Net, eat more,laze around. Sunday's when I finally get the strength to do my homework (often doing it when 6:00 pm comes). That's only when the haze in my brain fades away and I face the reality that tomorrow's back to school and no eating at every moment anymore. Sigh.

Tomorrow's another fresh, blank page to write on.

Oops, papa calls me again. Warningly. So I think I better go now. It wouldn't be wise to disobey ;).

Babbling's over. At least I've written something.